Joshaway, Texas Christmas Eve Celebration

   Another letter came from my friend, Rufus Potter, owner of the Hay and Grain Store in my hometown of Joshaway, Texas. Rufus was reporting on the Christmas Eve Celebration.

Dear Rick,

   Wall, we had our Christmas Eve git together down to the Abundant Life Victory Center for Christan Fellowship Holyness Church. You remember, they have that big sign with their church name on it. Their new buildin’ used to be the old Piggly Wiggly, which we was all sad to see it close, since we could get the good meat cuts there from Clarence, the butcher, and it threw him so far outa work he had to move over to the Lion King in Godley and that did not work out so well, neither, what with their rewrappin’ the used meat and all.

   Clarence wouldn’t stand for it and so was fired there. I hear he is workin’ as the Wall-Mart greeter in Cleburne and he was always a glad hander but it seems to me a tarrible waste of a good butcher.

   Meemaw could not go this time. Her Blue Apozoodies has turned into a full blown case of the P-neemonies and she is hackin’ and spittin’ something serious. I trust she will pull out of it but you know Meemaw; she is ready to go at any time and has picked out the purple dress for her funeral, the bright pink casket and the blue flower spray. She does know her colors.

   Wall, we all thought the Christmas Eve Celebration was at 6 in the evenin’ and so cows could be milked but Mizz Frumm, the assistant pastor, she runs the Christian school for the kids that can’t go to alternative school no more, she has to go to Durant for the holidays to visit her son, who is in the half-way house there now that he is out of Big Mac. He is trainin’ to be a tatoo artist and to remove tatoos as well, so makin’ business for hisself comin’ and goin’. Wall, Mizz Frumm, she is in charge of the celebration and, wantin’ to git a early start to Durant, since her Yugo is still havin’ problems, Yugo, that is her husband, she met him on the internet and went over to Croatia to marry and bring him home, only to discover he needed to bring his momma and three kids and sister-in-law, who looks an awful lot like the kids, wall, she moved the celebration to four pm, so they could git off and git to Durant.

   It seemed funny, havin’ Christmas Eve in daylight but Mizz Frumm proved from the Bible that’s how the first Christmas happened, since they did not have electric lites back then and so the star burnt all day, even through the snow, and so we was well satisfied, since she knows her Bible history pritty good.

   Wall, the whole thing started and got pretty disorganized fast. They had dresst up the Filmore’s ole sway back burro as a camel, with a fake hump, and that fell thru when Mr. Green, ya know, he is pretty hefty, sat down on the donkey-camel hump and fell to the floor. I didn’t think he made much of a wise man, anyway, but he had glued his Santa beard on hard for the parade, couldn’t git it off and so was made to be a wise man, until he hit the floor and the donkey went to kickin’ and drove the second to the last pew, you remember, itus loose anyway, right into the wall, knockin’ over the display of the Missionaries From Around the World sponsored by the Abundant Life Victory Center for Christian Fellowship Holyness Church and sendin’ it splashin’ around the room, it featurin’ a virtual ocean as it does, with fish and all.

   We got Mr. Green up so he could bring his frankincents on in to the manger scene. Here there was another problem, what with Mizz Frumm insistin’ her boy, Cheyene Dakota, play the Baby Jesus again. Wall, he is thirteen now, has most of his teeth, has feet bigger than mine and won’t hold still for nuthin’ and did not want to be the Baby Jesus again, anyway. If yuz to ask me, it is time to put our foot down on that one, before next year and we have to git a bigger trough for the manger.

   Wall, the rest of it went off without a hitch and we wuz out by 5:00 pm, so the cows got milked. There uz a full moon that night and I sat on the porch of the doublewide you helped me connect and lookt at it. The moon, I mean.

   Shore does seem odd God would let His Son come into the world to see that moon from totherside of where He made it. I am glad, though, with the stress and all, that Jesus did come and break up all the shoppin’ for awhile.

   Yore my good friend, Rick, but Jesus is still my best friend, jest like when you and me uz baptized down in the creek all them years ago. I am glad for my friend to write to, you, and my friend to set on the porch with as well.

   Wall, that’s about it. We still got fish to catch. I made you a new, good cane pole. Bring one a them big books yer always roonin’ you eyes on and get down here, will ya?

Your friend,

Rufus

   

   

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